Five days of Covid Christmas might turn out to be utterly Hell-ish – Vladimir McTavish

Normally the city centre would be thronging with drunken revellers this weekend. Yet we are still going to have Christmas this year. All five days of it.

Michael Gove announced a week ago the UK-wide agreement that we can all enjoy the company of two other households from Wednesday 23 to Sunday 27 December. For some people, this is clearly not enough. For others, it is far too much.

Trains will be packed, motorways will be congested. Those working in the transport sector, and in motorway services, will not be able to take five days off during this period. Nor will our already stretched key workers in the NHS, the police and the fire service. Will they get an alternative five-day window in which they can mix with friends and loved ones?

Furthermore, how many people actually want to spend as long as five days with their own family, let alone factoring in another household. And that really is five whole days in the house for most of us in Tier Three. No escaping to the pub, no nipping out to watch the football.

It will also divide families with over two adult siblings. A number of people whom I know are deeply upset at being the one household not invited for family Christmas. An equally large number are saying “Why me? Why do I have to go? Is it not Kirsty’s turn to put up with David and Karen’s hyperactive kids and Aunt Brenda’s passive-aggressive gift-giving?”

There are others who will miss out too. For example, Boris Johnson will not be able to see all of his children as he cannot remember how many households that could potentially involve.

But spare a thought for the real victims and share their pain. Imagine how utterly Hell-ish it will be for the other two families who have to put up with Michael Gove’s company for five days. Nobody wants to be on their own at this time of year, but for me it would be highly preferable to that appalling scenario.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

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